Friday, March 26, 2010

And now for something completely different.

That last article is pretty weird, no? So let's turn to something more wholesome. Something almost definitively wholesome - a yummy, healthy sandwich.

* * *
My Delicious,
HEALTHY
Veggie Sammich

This is what I eat every day for lunch at work. At first, I was trying to re-create Subway's turkey sub, but I discovered the effect of tryptophan was too much of an issue - so I simply deleted it from the recipe, and found I enjoyed the meatless sandwich even more. Here's how it's done, and here's what you'll need:
  • a nice six-inch sandwich roll
  • a not-quite-ripe tomato (2 slices per sammich)
  • black olives (3 per sammich, more if you like)
  • spanish onion (1 slice)
  • iceberg lettuce (a half a palm's worth)
  • dill (garlic) pickles (a half a pickle's worth)
  • dijon mustard
  • Miracle Whip
Short recipe:
Put all those ingredients between two halves of a bun, and eat what you've created.

Long recipe:
Split the bun, and put the mayo on the bottom. If you don't like mayo or are a vegan, it's surely skippable. I tend to cut my tomato slices first (2 slices), then leave them to sit on a paper towel for a few minutes - this step, in addition to choosing firm, not-quite-ripe tomatoes has a huge impact on how soggy your sandwich will be, come lunch time.

Next, the olives.

They olives need to be quartered. I find the best way to achieve this is to cut into them until I hit the pit, then roll them on the board, creating a seam across its circumference. Gently crush it with the flat edge of the knife (a little like crushing garlic), separate the halves and pop out the seed. Cut each of the two halves in half, and repeat for the other two olives.

Place the olives down on the mayo - our whipped friend will hold them in place.

Julienne (cut) the lettuce (into little strips) and make yourself a nice bed of it on top of the olives.

The two tomato slices go here. On top of that go two rings of the Spanish onion.

"What's a Spanish onion?" you may be asking. My friend, a Spanish onion is what ever hamburger you'll ever have has been missing. They're sweet, crunchy, with only a hint of the pungent flavor we associate with the name onion. Trust me, it's delicious.

So, two rings of Spanish onion - placed so they form a figure 8, each on top of a tomato slice.

Slice up your pickle. I cut a dozen or so little discs from mine, as long slices have a habit of getting pulled out of the sandwich (this is the same reason we julienne the lettuce). Smaller discs better ensures a bit of pickle in every bite. Use the onion rings as little makeshift cups, to keep your pickles in place. Once this has been arranged, place a third (larger) ring of the onion on top, in the middle of your figure 8.

Apply the dijon mustard to the top half of your bun, and seal the deal.


I've probably lost thirty pounds since I started eating these sandwiches, and they're yummy enough that always look forward to lunch.

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