Friday, December 2, 2016

Let's make this quick, shall we?

Like pulling off a bandaid.  Lots to deal with, and zero spirit to do so.  So...

Overwatch won big at The Game Awards last night, which are - as a general rule - stupid, and not worth paying attention to.  There are better ways to spend one's time.  For example, I could have my nipples removed via belt sander, lay under a sickly cow until it defecates into my eyes, or - and this is what I actually did - watch The Jungle Book on Netflix with a loved one.  It's not bad!  Not amazing.  Pretty not-bad, though.

People really need to stop Bill Murray from singing.  I get that you like it, but you're not good at it.  I feel like I'm getting off-topic, what was I talking about..?

Oh right.  Overwatch won big at The Game Awards.  Specifically,


  • Game of the Year
  • Best Game Direction
  • Best Multiplayer
  • Best Esports Game
This will shock you, but I'm okay with this.  Overwatch ain't too shabby. 

Forza Horizon 3 won best Sports/Racing Game, which should please Chamberlain, Civilization 6 won Best Strategy and the Blood and Wine DLC for Witcher 3 won best RPG, which should please Alex. Dishonored 2 got Best Action/Adventure, and DOOM won for Best Action Game and Best Music/Sound Design - which pleases me.  

In the you-gotta'-be-kiddin'-me category, Pokemon Go won Best Family Game which is fucking bullshit when Ratchet & Clank exists, and Inside won for Best Art Direction which is fucking bullshit because Odin Sphere Leifthrasir exists.  

But the real reason to pay attention to The Game Awards are the reveals.  This is where we learned about No Man's Sky, remember, and definitely not where we actually played No Man's Sky.  

So what did we get?

We got some Prey footage!  I have neither the energy nor the heart to watch it. 


But still, Prey looks fucking awesome.  I don't remember who coined it, but yeah, this is a spiritual successor to the System Shock/BioShock games - kinda' like Dishonored is for Thief.  

Ummm there is a new trailer for Hideo Kojima's Death Stranding which was all over my Twitter today, but I haven't watched it yet.  Here, you watch it.  Lemmie know what you think.  Apparently Mads Mikkelsen is in it, so that's fucking awesome. 


Mass Effect Andromeda got some gameplay shown, 


The Specter of Torment DLC for Shovel Knight got a trailer, 


Telltale are indeed making a Guardians of the Galaxy game, 


and that rumored new-gen up-port of Bulletstorm is indeed happening.  Comin' April 7th. 


And yeah.  That was The Game Awards.  What else... there's something else... Oh right.  Flinthook is coming to PS4.  That's pretty cool.





Not cool enough, obviously. 

Oh and The Flame in the Flood is coming to PS4.  That is also cool.  It's called a "Complete Edition," but beyond director commentary there aren't any deets on what's so complete about it.  Still, I'm more likely to play it on my PS4 than my laptop.  Not that I'll play it on my PS4 either.  Overwatch, you understand. 


Comin' in January. 

And that's it.  

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